Dear Papa

Sorry, it took me so long to write this letter.

My earliest memory of you goes back to when I was 9 years old. That one moment is still so alive in memory, one day I fell in school and I hit my head. My teachers wanted to take me to some good doctor but I was so adamant that I wanted to be treated by my Doctor Uncle only. Because I always thought you had some magic wand that cured and healed me every time without any pain.

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You were not just My father’s friend or our Doctor but you were my Doctor Uncle, my guide & philosopher. Whenever I used to cry or get down with illness, you just didn’t provide the medical aid but also the words of wisdom and strength to infuse me with courage and knowledge to not to bow down but to face the adversity head-on.
Also, I appreciate everything you did for my education and career, like my own father. You were always available to counsel me and clear my doubts. I think I am one lucky daughter-in-law who possesses wonderful childhood memories with her father-in-law.

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The universe conspired in my favour, I got married to your son and became part of your family. Like any other girl, after marriage, there had been some significant changes in my life too. But the best part was, that your affection never changed you remained the same. In fact, papa in the new house, in the new family if I ever had any doubt, it was your face I used to seek. After, your son and I moved to Europe to begin our family life you were more excited and happy than us. When I used to call you from there you never asked me how well I take care of your son but you were always concerned about my career and health in the new country. Encouraged me to work on my passion for writing and developing my own personality and not just limit myself trying to be a good homemaker & a wife. From Doctor Uncle you became my Doctor Papa.

When we had just begun to make the memories together as a family, God called you home. On 26 August 2017, we lost you. Papa, Home is now not home without you. I wish I could see you one more time come walking through the door to hug us when we enter the home. I wish I would have approached you to say things I had always wanted to say but never could. Those unspoken feelings and words unsaid rumble on the inside.

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As your daughter in law, I wanna share with you some things and feelings clutching my heart.
Firstly, I never got a chance to show my gratitude for teaching your son so well while he was young, to be a perfect gentleman one day. He is totally like you. He adores me and values me exactly the way you loved my mother in law. Every day when he gets ready for his office and looks himself in the mirror he says “I wanna be like my dad” and I heartily wish that his wish come true.
Secondly, This one sad thought disturbs me a lot that one day when I and your son will have kids. And, my future kids have just missed the opportunity to grow up in the guidance and love of a truly grand grandfather. I am worried if we would be able to pass on the knowledge & experiences, we learnt from you to the next generation? that too, without you !!! But, I promise papa I will pass your memories, stories of your life and your words of wisdom down our generation. I will teach them diligently to keep the legacy of integrity, honesty and humbleness always on.
And, the third thing now, you will be proud that I have really become a stronger person as you always wanted me to be and have started taking my passion for writing seriously, as a blogger. But, yes I miss my biggest fan and guide.

You will always be our superhero. The Hardest part I think, was not the goodbye but it’s now to learn to live without you. Futile efforts of filling your void. You will always live inside us and very close to our hearts. We all love you and miss you so much. I cherish all our memories together of the past but I really miss making new memories in the future we will never have.

I know you are watching over us!

Your daughter
Kukku